Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Ena Vie on Tour...Updates from the road #8


these are just some of the words that have been swirling around my hemisphere of life as of late.

last i wrote (which was just last week...) howard and i were fresh off the bhakti fest block...decompressing from a summer of touring...california, oregon, nevada and hawaii. we have been on the trip of a lifetime...and often it is beyond magical...and many days, it is a far cry from glamorous.

we have not been in LA since we left last April, and we have spent the last week in Southern California due to a postponement of a workshop we were scheduled for in Florida. after spending the majority of the summer surrounded by pine trees, mountains, lakes, rolling hills, meadows, fields and plains...i must confess that returning to LA has felt like my soul was placed in a blender and my skin was consumed by a bad case of hives. so howard and i have been on edge...to say the least. it takes a bit of emotional and physical 'protection' to be in LA, or any large city, and we have spent all summer replacing our metallic bodies with more supple ones.

one day last week, howard's phone cracked and broke, we got a $64 parking ticket because we didn't read the 7th sign on the post that read..."no parking on FRI from 1-3" and it was 2:30 on Fri at verizon, where we were looking inside to fix howard's phone! then, we found out that our '97 volvo needs an $800 dollar overhaul, one of our workshops cancelled...and as we are living on a shoe string and a prayer...all of this in one day was a bit much to swallow...meanwhile we can barely breathe in the City of Angels.

we returned to our dear friend's home where we were staying for a few days in between the festival and our next gig, and i had a few tears in my eye...sharing with her our day...feeling overwhelmed and a bit frustrated that in the midst of us 'leaving it all behind for our passion' we were getting kicked in our behinds on the way out the door!

she looked me straight in the eye, with complete and utter compassion and love, and said gently,
'ena, no one said life was going to be easy. this is part of being human...and...you could be living a number of other scenarios, and yet these situations are merely this...situational circumstances. it doesn't define who you are, and it most definitely does not define or reflect your decision to leap for your passion in music and sound healing...it is life.........






yes...i remember...she speaks truth, i am having a human experience...and of course...i am never the victim, in fact...i am always the creator ~ co-creator.

another breath.

more letting go, and now, another letting go of some deeper sense of entitlement...perhaps i thought that if i let go of everything (home, clothes, lifestyle, city, cars, etc.) that was in the way of me and my dream (or us and our dreams...) that somehow the flood gates would open wide, the path would be paved, people would catch the vision and mission of our music and all would be well, easy, no challenges, no tickets, no broken phones, no empty venues, there would be millions of cd's sold, music spreading immediately like wildfire...and so on, and so forth.

suddenly i realized how grateful i was to be standing there, (or how grateful i am to be standing here) in the face of my friend's loving compassion and acceptance for who i am and what i was living at the moment...she was reflecting to me my own loving compassion and acceptance of who i am...that i am enough...and that this is all there really is.

i was reminded of eckhart tolle's statement...

"If you are aligned with the moment, the kind of action that you take is qualitatively totally different from the kind of action that you take when you deny or dislike the present moment out of the feeling that you want to get somewhere better than this moment."

right now...i am taken care of....

right now...i am loved

right now...i have breath

right now...i have life

right now...i am empowered to live this moment

and then....the magic of life is revealed again. or rather, my eyes can see the magic more clearly because whatever fears or doubts or frustrations or challenges that were occluding my vision...fall away.

ironically...the Florida workshops began to fill up for the following weekend, and invitations for more work and shows seemed to be appearing in our in-boxes...it was as if we needed to stay in the middle of the city, in the middle of the hurricane, to tune into, and re-member the Presence that is everywhere, in all things and made of all things.

my external circumstances do not determine who or what i am.

most often, if not always, i find that those fears, doubts, etc...are linked to the past and the pain from the stories of what i have lived, or they are linked to the future...and what i think may or may not happen. all of which are taking my heart and mind away from the present, from WHAT IS...and the infinite possibilities of the Universe.

so here is to the MOMENT...the vast, eternal moment of NOW.

here is to taking risks, without attachment to the outcome.

here is to living and cultivating our dreams and visions...and taking deep breaths along the way.

and here is to friends and community who show their support and love by being themselves.

all i am seeking and needing, is here, in this moment, within the PRESENCE of my spirit being, of who I AM...right now.

i am not alone.

you are not alone.

we are guided and loved.

'til next time ~

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Ena Vie on Tour...Updates from the road #7

Notes from the road...the road of life, the road of touring, the road of music, the inner road of spiritual remembrance, the in-roads of surrendering, being stripped down of all that is not WHO I AM to return to THAT WHICH IS...

this is in part what is unfolding on our TOUR this past summer, and our TOUR continues!

we just finished playing at bhakti fest this weekend...it was a powerful time for so many reasons...the biggest reason is the sensation of stepping into the river of bhakti, sanskrit for devotion, and floating down that river for 4 days, 24 hours of constant music, (save for a few thunder storms and rain)...and surrendering the mind, thoughts and anything else that is not in alignment with the divine to the moment.

if you ever get a chance to go to this festival it is well worth your time, effort, energy and resources...because the pay off is priceless. stepping into the vibration of ancient sound and language that is pulsing throughout the festival grounds, along with yogis practicing their yoga, meditation and art is something to experience...at least once...and for some...everyday. this is our 3rd bhakti fest, and our first year having our own set, and it was probably the most powerful festival for us because in many ways it felt like a homecoming. we left our house and home, recording studio and our community last april, of this year, and we have been out in the world giving our gifts, receiving gifts from others and being on the most accelerated learning curve of a lifetime!! (and i used to be a sprinter at UCLA - so i know how to move quickly!! this is nothing like i have experienced before, that is for sure). we have been honing our skills, playing in all kinds of places where we have been challenged with everything you can think of, and then to arrive in our hometown, see all our community and musician friends and have them reflect to us the positive reflection of our growth along with their love...caused my heart to open even more and realize that while this summer has been one of the most challenging of my life...it has made me a more professional musician, caused my mind to expand and let go...caused me to grow into the person i know i am ....and to cultivate a depth within that i only prayed for before taking this leap into trust and faith in the universe.

yes...we have been in our car, our volvo station wagon, crammed in with all our gear, our clothes, musical equipment and our 12 year old dog. yes we have been camping in tents, sleeping in new beds almost every night, not knowing sometimes where we are sleeping, where we are eating...and in the midst of it all...the sound frequency of our souls continues to guide us. we are being shown every day, and more often than not, every moment, how guided, protected and cared for we really are. there has not been one day or night that we have not been provided for, and while we envision our tour to unfold in new and more supportive ways...we can honestly look at the past 4 months and see that we are loved, we are not alone and we are walking down a road that is in alignment with our passion...so we continue, each day, each step, each moment...and it is unfolding in perfection. even when it doesn't look like it circumstantially...

so it has been a journey...and it continues! our summer season of festivals, house concerts, yoga studios and other venues up and down the california and oregon coast, nevada and hawaii is coming to a close...and now we are planning our next leg of our tour, this fall...in the bay area, winter in the hawaiian islands and we are looking to go back east in the spring....stay tuned for more dates and info for that as it arises.

go here ENA VIE if you want to explore more dates and info now.

in the midst of writing this blog, i was almost finished with writing this post, and somehow, as i  uploaded a few pictures, i lost the majority of this post...so here i am now, looking to capture the essence of what was written in reflection of this last month or so....and it all disappeared...what a metaphor for this journey we have been on.


take another breath....


just when i think i can write down my experience, capture it in a blog or in reflection...it disappears...of course the only way we can experience anything is in the moment...and then it vanishes...just like writing a song or recording or performing it. the song itself is expressed and written in the moment, and then the performance and recording of it is a whole different expression of it...and each time i play it, it takes on its own personality according to whomever is in the audience, who we are playing with, what is in the stars that evening and so on, and so on.

so here we are...reading and writing and sharing this blog together in this moment.

there are a few things i would like to share and recapture in this writing....

Peace Village Festival in Ashland, OR was a very special gathering where we made new friends and fans up at the beautiful Jackson Wellsprings....a sacred land holding the healing mineral hot springs that soothe the mind, soul and body. We had a great time sharing our music, listening to the gifts of others and offering medicine music around the sacred fires late into the evening and early morning hours. we were given the opportunity to share our hearts more intimately at few house concerts both in Ashland and Williams and this was probably the most special

we spent some time in Mt. Shasta camping and exploring the mountain, drinking from the pure, crystalline headwaters and sitting in the mystical lands of panther and squaw meadows....what a blessing to visit and be visited by this mountain...we will return again soon!

so now we take the next steps forward....sharing our sound and our hearts with new friends, in new locations and in new realms.

it seems that the moment i try and figure it all out, it falls a part...and then when i let go...i get more than i could ask for and see my life shining down in all directions and coming through me in all directions...as esoterically as this can sound, it is truly how i am learning to let go, be in the flow of the moment, trust that the plans we are making in the future are unfolding as they are intended to...and...i am not holding on to any of it.

come join me in the unfolding...come sit in the place of no-thing and everything...and let's explore together our souls joining in the union of breath, of sound, of passions shared and of hearts opening and returning to our true nature...which is LOVE incarnate in the moment of all that is.

see you down the road...and until next time...


we are going to be in the Bay Area/Marin/Sebastopol/Berkeley in the month of October and early November...so check out our website to find out dates, times and locations...here's a sneak peek at where we are booking now!

yoga of sausalito
harbin hot springs
open secret bookstore
devi yoga center

house concerts - yoga studios and more to come!!

we look forward to sharing in the healing sound of music and love with you soon!

Ena Vie (ee-nuh vee)